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AFL chief executive Gillon McLachlan had a huge day on Saturday, including an address to the AFL Commission Grand Final Luncheon at the MCG’s Olympic Room, which was packed with sporting, business and political heavy hitters, before the first bounce at the ’G.
McLachlan had some kind words for the fellow chief executives in attendance, assuring them that “the world hasn’t ended because they are not as good as Alan Joyce by the length of a straight”.
AFL Commission chair Richard Goyder (left) and AFL CEO Gillon McLachlan arrive to the North Melbourne Grand Final Breakfast.Credit:AAP
That was a gentle dig at the league’s chairman Richard Goyder who also chairs Qantas and his eye-catching backing recently of the carrier’s under-fire boss Joyce, whom Goyder described as “the best CEO in Australia by a length of a straight”.
The flak didn’t end there, with McLachlan noting he was “less good” than Joyce and that chairing the AFL Commission was a “thankless task”, rather like “chairing Qantas”.
But one of the best tales was from Goyder’s speech, in which he retold an interaction earlier in the morning at the grand final breakfast between Prime Minister Anthony Albanese and AFLW star Emma Kearney.
Apparently, Kearney asked Albanese what he did before politics, to which Albanese replied “not much”.
Kearney then quickly retorted: “What do you do now then? Not much”.
Goyder also said in his speech that a former PM had called a national security council meeting in the third quarter one year “I suspect because of boredom”, but told Albanese he doubted Geelong fan Richard Marles would attend if he pulled the same stunt this year, unless the Cats were being flogged.
It’s not easy to pull a face out of a 100,000-strong crowd, especially someone who doesn’t want to show their face. But we’re quite certain that was Western Bulldogs livewire Bailey Smith spotted at the ’G, with a jacket over his head. After the season he’s had, it’s no surprise that Smith might want to keep a low profile.
There are no cheap seats at an AFL grand final, but just look at the spot $4.5 billion buys you.
Seven West media boss Kerry Stokes and News International’s Lachlan Murdoch were prominent on either side of McLachlan to watch the game, after Stokes’ Channel 7 and the Murdochs’ Foxtel recently agreed to pay the big bucks in return for seven years of AFL TV rights.
CBD does feel, though, that Seven’s commentary team could have been a teeny bit more gracious to Murdoch. When the cameras picked up the trio, the men behind the microphones gushed about their own boss, Stokes, while if Murdoch Jr got a mention at all, it was decidedly muted.
Maybe they were afraid of legal action from the increasingly litigious heir apparent.
Murdoch and wife Sarah arrived late and left early.
With what passes for Qantas service and reliability right now, and the happy couple’s habit of getting around in a News Corp private jet these days, we wonder if they eschewed commercial back to Sydney?
Still the early departure spared the two TV tycoons an awkward conversation about the soft-ish TV ratings for Saturday’s game.
Earlier on the big day, North Melbourne’s traditional Grand Final Breakfast brought Albanese and Opposition Leader Peter Dutton into the same room with lots of big names from the footy world including former Kangaroos coach Dani Laidley, Jonathan Brown, Jarryd Roughead, Cameron Mooney and Eddie McGuire.
Aside from Albanese’s well-documented “stop the boats” gag, the PM swung a boot at his predecessor Scott Morrison for secretly swearing himself into several ministries.
“I’m really worried that when I was away last week in London, Richard Marles was the acting prime minister, so I’m worried he has sworn himself in as the minister to the Cats and approved yet another renovation of Kardinia Park,” he said.
Albanese predicted the Swans would take home the premiership by two goals with Sydney skipper Luke Parker winning the Norm Smith Medal.
During his speech at the breakfast, Dutton compared the AFL to politics and the Speaker of the House of Representatives to an umpire.
“He … gives a lot of free kicks to the other mob,” he told the audience.
“The teals are a bit like Greater Western Sydney, a cashed up motley crew with a few extra draft picks, but most of us are still wondering how on earth they got into the competition.
“The Coalition, on the other hand, is a bit like watching the Brisbane Lions. A merger of convenience back in the day, three consecutive premierships in recent history, but couldn’t back it up with a fourth.”
Dutton also reminded attendees about a gaffe by former Liberal prime minister Malcolm Turnbull ahead of the AFL grand final in 2008.
Barrel of laughs – Peter Dutton at the 2022 North Melbourne Grand Final Breakfast.Credit:Marta Pascal Juanola
When Turnbull was asked what footy team he barracked for, he responded the Sydney Roosters.
“So there’s hopefulness,” he said.
Dutton, a Brisbane Lions supporter, sided with Marles, tipping the Cats.
“Our friendship, of course, has been tested in recent times because not only did he win the election, he took my job as defence minister. But I’m siding with Richard today,” he said.
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